Hugs + Kisses

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We all go through rough patches as parents. Life with two boys is wild, exciting, and unpredictable. It’s also really exhausting.

People always ask, “So when are you going to have another? You have to have a girl next.”

I give the same response every time,  “We’re soooo done and we’re really happy with 2 boys”.

The badgering usually continues and lately I’ve been quick to shut this conversation down. It doesn’t offend me and it’s not too personal, but unless you plan on being pregnant for me for the next 40 weeks and my live in nanny for the next 18 years, I’m more than happy with 2.

That’s the bitchy, I’m stretched too thin response running through my head. My actual response…”My husband has a vasectomy, so unless it’s really meant to be we’re pretty done”. The conversation usually transitions into questions about the boys.

Life with a 1.5 and 3.5 year old feels like one big roller coaster ride at times. They’re each going through their own developmental stages, neither of them want to share, and there’s continual screaming and crying. This parent thing gets hard, and it takes its toll, physically, mentally, and emotionally.

Recently, I’ve had to take a step back and be honest with myself. My approach to discipline combined with my lack of patience is not serving the boys or myself well anymore. As they change and grow I need to remember to do the same. I need to make my best most conscious effort to become a more gentle, patient, calm and soothing mother.

Less yelling and more talking about feelings. No more time outs, instead hugging and kissing out our frustrations. Not being too tired to answer the 5 million questions asked daily. Letting the messes be made. Taking time to spend more one on one time with the boys. And most of all not being so hard on myself.

We all have our good and bad days. I need to remind myself that these bad days are just that, only bad days. They don’t make me a bad mom and they don’t mean I’m failing. They’re opportunities to learn and grow and thrive. They’re opportunities for me to really listen to what my kids have to teach me.

 

 

 

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